Month: August 2020

Going Deep in Your Story, Part 2

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There are plenty of ways to go deep into the story you’re telling. Many people think going deep refers to deep point of view, which I covered in last week’s post. Today, I want to discuss ways to add richness to your storytelling by going deep in other ways.

One way is to use all five senses (smell, sight, taste, touch, and hearing). Yes, I know this is a basic rule. But think…in this digital age, when was the last time you put your phone away and just looked?  Learn to be an observer of people and environments. People watch. What do you notice? What about your environment? What color of blue is the sky? How does the snow look when it falls slowly?

Take a scene you’re currently working on. Have you included what the character experiences? The purr of a sports car? The stickiness of a fast-food counter? Smells are sometimes overlooked, but I love these lines from Rudyard Kipling: “Smells are surer than sights or sounds/To make your heart-strings crack…”

Sometimes I’ll include the sixth sense, intuition (sparingly). You know that feeling of knowing when someone’s lying or when your hair rises on the back of your neck? This sense is great for creating tension.

I can imagine you’re thinking, “But I can’t write the story and include all of that at the same time—it’s too much!” You’re right, it is. So just write the story first. One of my favorite quotes is by Terry Pratchett: “The first draft is just you telling yourself the story.” Spill everything onto the page. Don’t edit, don’t fuss about word choice. It doesn’t need to be pretty—you can add the five senses in the following drafts.

Something else you can include in the second draft (& third, and fourth, and fifth, and…) is descriptions. Metaphors and similes add to the mood of the story as well. Make use of them (again, sparingly) through the character’s eyes. For example, a high society woman wouldn’t say or think someone was “as happy as a pig in slop.” Stay true to your character so the reader can stay in the character’s skin.

Show, don’t tell, how someone feels. Telling is much weaker than showing.

Shari felt anger sweep over her. Instead: Shari clenched her shaking hands into fists.

Ron was ashamed. Instead: Ron blushed and turned away.

The Emotion Thesaurus by Angela Ackerman and Becca Puglisi is a great resource to use. It matches actions to feelings to help you make the shift from telling to showing.

Enjoy going deep in your next story!

Going Deep in Your Story, Part 1

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Have you ever heard of deep point of view? As a  writer, you want to transport the reader into the story. You want them there with the characters, feeling and experiencing everything they are. Deep point of view accomplishes that.

It’s a more intimate way of writing. The writer removes the narrator and settles into a comfy chair in the chosen character’s head. Although deep POV usually refers to third person, I’ve also found writing this way helpful in first person as well. It is limiting, though. You can’t know what the other characters are thinking because you’re firmly entrenched in your comfy chair. You can see reactions, but the other characters’ thoughts are hidden.

There are several other things to remember with deep POV.

You have to pick a character to inhabit. You can’t do two or three characters at a time. When you change scenes or chapters, you can slip into someone else’s head, but don’t do it within the scene. It’s sometimes referred to as head-hoppping, and it’s very confusing to the reader.

Avoid dialogue tags (in third person.) If you’re in Ron’s head, you wouldn’t say Ron snapped at Sharon. You’d use interiority to give the reader a window into what’s he thinking. For example: “No, you can’t have the last pickle.” He gritted his teeth. I’ve never seen someone as selfish as Sharon.

Avoid “distancing” words. She felt, noticed, realized, thought, looked at, etc. For example: Shari exited the shop. She noticed the dark sky. In seconds, she felt the heavy raindrops soak her clothes as she ran for her car. I’ll have to drive home carefully, she thought.

The same passage with deep viewpoint: Shari exited the shop. Dark clouds loomed, blocking the sun. In seconds, raindrops soaked her clothes as she ran for her car. I’ll have to drive home carefully.

Although these aren’t excerpts from the great American novel, the reader is closer to the characters. They sense Ron’s irritation and experience the storm as Shari does.

A couple of books cover this writing technique. A good one is Rivet Your Reader with Deep Point of View by Jill Elizabeth Nelson. Another is Writing Deep Viewpoint by Kathy Tyers.

Try this technique the next time you sit down to write. It’ll make your characters come alive for your readers.

 

Avoid Vanilla Writing, Part 2

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Welcome to #WritingWednesday. Last week we talked about a few ways to avoid boring writing. This week, I have a few more tips for you to keep your story interesting and your readers engaged!

 

  1. Hello Again: (At these two words, I’ve got The Cars singing in my head.) Anyway, have you ever read something like the following?

“Hello, George.”

“Hey, Larry! Long time no see. How’ve you been?”

“Pretty good. How about you?”

“Well, I can’t complain. How are your kids?”

Yawn. I don’t care about George, Larry, or either of their families. While dialogue should be natural, don’t dwell on exchanges like this. Move on to good dialogue that moves the plot forward.

2. The Land of Exposition: Description is good, as is internal narrative. You’ll need both to flesh out your world and your characters. But please don’t dump it on the page in a massive paragraph. The eyes need white space to rest on. Lots of black words in a big chunk is an invitation to read a little and then skim. Some readers are fine with navel-gazing, descriptions in detail, and mental ruminations on the meaning of life. But keep it pertinent to the world-building, plot, and/or character because a little of this goes a long way.

3. Nobody Cares: The climax scene is critical.  As the two armies face each other, Minerva knows she must keep the faith. If her kingdom doesn’t win the war…she won’t make it to her bridge game on time. The only one concerned about that is Minerva herself.

Make your stakes matter. Then make it worse. What’s the worst-case scenario? Write it into the scene. That’s what your readers will care about. “Make it bad, then make it worse” so the happy ending’s satisfying. Which brings me to my last point…

4. “…and everyone lived happily ever after, forever and ever, with a big, red bow.” Hmm, maybe not. I NEED a happy ending. (I was very cross with Veronica Roth after reading the Divergent series. Just sayin’…) But that’s just me. You must decide how happy your ending’s going to be. Somewhat bittersweet? Tragic, like Romeo and Juliet? Or do we get the true HEA (Happily Ever After)? Even with an HEA, not every character is happy—not the villain and perhaps not some secondary characters. There may be unpleasant circumstances due to bad decisions. That’s okay. Just remember the expectations of your genre (romance readers expect an HEA or an HFN–Happy For Now). A spark of hope on the last page will satisfy your readers.

I hope these points help you craft exciting, riveting fiction. Do you have any rules you follow to keep your writing fresh and interesting? What are they?